Safety Girl! - 10/24/12

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Today's show I had a very special guest: Tanya Veilleux, who you might know as Safety Girl. She recently opened Get Curious with Safety Girl on Liberty (under Bongz & Thongz), and is on a mission to help the community by offering lots of toys, workshops, and fun costumes.

Something I love about what Tanya does, is that she is not afraid to be completely sex positive, and in a completely safe way. There are no dumb questions with her, and there's nothing TMI. You can talk about anything, and her shop is a completely safe space for this. Tanya also has developed a relationship with First Step, a domestic violence support community, which I think is so necessary to talk about and bring to light, since 1 in 4 women has experienced domestic violence.

The thing I realized while talking to Tanya was that it's important to band together in small communities like ours. Sometimes it's hard to open up about your sexuality, whether your straight or queer, and it feels good to have other people that are open about it. That is one of the fundamental reasons for my show here guys: to make you feel comfortable talking about your sexuality. I want you to feel empowered and comfortable with yourself, and the only way for that to happen is if other people are open about their own sexuality. Sex-positivism is catching.

Music you heard:

1. "Curious Jungle" by Podington Bear
2. "Ask Me Now" by Thelonious Monk
3. Safety Girl Theme

Useful links:

1. Get Curious with Safety Girl
2. Safety Girl on Facebook
3. "Boutique caters to student sexual needs" via Michigan Daily
4. First Step

Fetishism - 10/17/12

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Did you think you were the only one who liked the smell of your girlfriend on her period? You're not alone. There are innumerable kinds of fetishes, and chances are, you have one.

Don't freak out, though. Pretty much everyone on the planet has one fetish (or more). Whether you're into red heads or leather, there's something for everyone, and it makes us who we are, and what affects our sexual tastes. And as we say numerous times, as long as it's not hurting anyone, and everyone's consenting, I don't think there's anything wrong with it. Part of figuring out your own sexuality is delving into stuff like this, and that's what makes us all unique, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with you for having a fetish that other people might think is weird. Chances are, there is someone (or many people) who has the same fetish as you. Just look at how the BDSM community has blossomed! Although it's still considered strange to some people, it's much more acceptable, and to be honest, I've heard a lot of couples say they have tried bondage at least once.

WARNING: We talk about some strong topics, such as cannibalism, rape, and murder fetishes, so if this triggers you, proceed with caution.

Useful links:

1. Sexual fetishism via Wikipedia
2. List of paraphilias via Wikipedia
3. AskMeAnything (AMA): I am a current furry who has attended 17 furry conventions.

Music you heard:

1. "Bear Hug" by 2 Bears
2. "Crane/White Lightning" by The RZA and Charles Bernstein from Kill Bill Vol. 1
3. "Mein Teil" by Rammstein

Bullying Part 2 - 10/10/12

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Welcome to week 2 of Bullying Awareness Month at The Sex and Tell Show!

When it comes to bullying, the major idea is that students feel safe. If they don't feel safe, they will not report bullying when it happens. They won't know who to trust, and they won't feel comfortable talking about it with just anyone, because maybe THEY will bully them too. Even the smallest things can help, like having a rainbow flag sticker on your door, or an HRC sticker on a water bottle. Having materials (brochures, etc.) in your office will let students know that they can talk to you. Kids pay attention, and they notice more than you think they do. 

Another important thing that I think all schools should do, is to provide some sort of informational assembly (or multiple assemblies), regarding the LGBT community. Have someone explain what queer means, or what being transgender means. Inform your students, and they will be less likely to bully, because they will UNDERSTAND. Same thing with adults, which is a reason why I have this show. When people are more educated on a topic, they are more sympathetic. They are less likely to say something offensive.

Music you heard:

1. "Eugenia" by Scott Joplin
2. Zeki Müren (forgot the song sorry!)

Useful links:

1. LGBT Youth Tip Sheet
2. 4 Steps Schools Can Take to Address Anti-LGBT Bullying and Harassment
3. Gay Bullying - National Youth Association
4. Transgender people and bullying

I hope this was helpful, and I hope it inspires you to stop bullying, in whatever form it takes. Tune in next week when we talk about fetishes!

Bullying Part 1 - 10/3/12

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In light of Bullying Awareness Month, I wanted to have an episode specifically on the kind of bullying that happens with queer kids in high schools, college, work, whatever. Turns out the episode didn't go quite as I planned, in the most glorious way. I'm really pleased with the way the topic went, and especially with my guests.

A major topic we talked about were the ways that people bully, and the kinds of people that bully. Here's the thing: everyone bullies and everyone is bullied. Bullying comes out of insecurity, or ignorance. The only way to stop is to be honest with ourselves about why we're feeling a certain way, and also to not let bullying slide. Ever. It's never OK, and it's not just something kids do. Adults do it too. Companies do it. Politicians do it.

The worst though is when someone is bullied for simply being who they are, which is why this topic is so important for a show like mine. This can pertain to anyone with a body. Whether it's making fun of someone for being overweight, calling someone a slut, or calling someone a fag. You can stop this. You don't have to tolerate it, and you shouldn't tolerate it. Every single person on the planet is so beautiful, and deserve as much respect as anyone else.

Also, as a side note, this episode was not only aired live, but was also filmed live by two wonderful ladies in a documentary film class at the university! Thanks for adding so much energy to the show!

Useful links:

1. CBS WKBT News Anchor's On-Air Response To A Viewer Calling Her Fat
2. FAQ: What is "slut-shaming"?
3. Bullying Prevention Tips (concise)
4. Gays Bullied To The Point Of Suicide

Music you heard:

1. Same Love feat. Mary Lambert by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis

If you're interested in this topic more, we're having Part 2 of Bullying next week, so definitely listen in. We didn't cover even half of the things I wanted to talk about, and since it's Bully Awareness Month, I think it deserves another show. See you next week!